By: Linnea Sieh, MA, LPC & Veronica Visger, MA, LPC, NCC

One of the most common questions that our counselors at All Things Possible Wellness Center PLLC (ATPWC) are getting asked right now is “Why should I try a telehealth therapy session?” We know you might be wondering what sessions might look like in the future as well. I’ll be trying to answer those questions for you, but if you have specific questions, you can certainly contact your therapist. If you’re reading this because you aren’t sure if you are ready to start therapy, or are looking to schedule a session, you can contact the office staff at (586) 213-5505. We would be honored to see you for telehealth as soon as possible or in person starting on 05/18/20, whatever is more comfortable for you.

It can be scary to think of starting a new type of therapy session when all you might want is some semblance of normalcy. Truthfully, telehealth sessions aren’t that much different from a regular therapy session. They can be used at other times, as well, such as in bad weather, or if you can’t get to the office that day. Most insurances cover some type of telehealth session. If you aren’t sure if your insurance covers it, you can contact them to ask. You will need to sign a specific consent form to be able to meet with telehealth sessions. Our form is here: https://allthingspossiblewc.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/ATPWC-Telemedicine-Consent-2020.pdf

As for what the session might look like, it’s pretty much the same as being in the office. Your therapist will be speaking to you from a safe, private place in their home or sometimes still in their office. They will take precautions to make sure your appointment is kept confidential and will ask you to also find a safe and private place. Sometimes this means sitting in your car, bathroom, or other different spot. Your therapist won’t judge your space, they will just be glad to be able to talk to you.

Some therapists might be wearing earbuds or other devices to make sure you aren’t overheard. They will use a secure video chat service, such as Doxy.me or Google Meet to be able to see and hear you. They might email you any handouts or homework assignments, instead of handing them to you.

If the technology is difficult to understand, our therapists can help walk you through the process. The services we are using at ATPWC generally involve using an app, or clicking on a link to join a secure virtual site that will only be for you. Generally, you can access the session on a phone, tablet, or computer.

Telehealth sessions also work with kids, although they might be shorter. Child and adolescent counselors might use games such as Pictionary, The Ungame, or other games to help kids talk about what might be bothering them. Regular games, such as Uno and Battleship can also be used. Kids also enjoy showing off their room, favorites toys, and pets to the counselor. I can’t speak for all the counselors at ATPWC, but one of my favorite parts of online sessions is getting to meet my kid clients’ pets. My dog also likes to join in sessions, even if it just means she’s snoozing on my lap.

To answer the question of why someone might want to use telehealth sessions, that is quite simple. In these stressful and confusing times, it’s helpful to be able to talk to someone who understands your concerns and has been working with you on coping skills. Taking a break from therapy when situations become more than you can handle can lead to feeling overwhelmed. Your counselor is part of your support system and should be utilized regularly. Despite not being in our offices, we’re still the same clinicians.

As to what sessions might look like in the future, they will admittedly be different. Therapists will still be offering telehealth sessions even after we open for in person sessions, if you are not able or don’t feel comfortable returning to in person sessions. Insurances may change what they cover for this service, but your therapist can offer other options if that becomes a concern.

All three of our offices will be opening for in person sessions on May 18th, including our new main office that relocated to 15 Mile Road in Clinton Township – 16645 15 Mile Rd, Ste B

We are taking the following precautions, following the CDC and state guidelines: 

• We will be wiping down high touch areas frequently, washing equipment and our hands between sessions. We will also have hand sanitizer available in our office for use during sessions, if needed.

• We will be asking our clients and clinicians to stay home if they are feeling ill or have been exposed to anyone who has been ill. Additionally, if you are in a high risk category, you may wish to continue to stay at home to protect yourself and others.

• We will be asking clients and clinicians to wear a mask/bandana/face covering when in the office, if medically able. Not all the clinicians are in the office on the same day, or at the same times, so we are already alternating the amount of people in the office at a time.

• We will be asking our clients or family members of clients to wait in their cars until the time of their appointments, rather than in our lobby. The beverage stations and waiting room chairs will be blocked off – our lobbies are closed to the public. Your clinician will text you when they are ready for your appointment and will meet you at the lobby doors to bring you or your child back for the appointment. Your child’s clinician will also walk your child back to the main doors after the appointment is completed.

• We will have HEPA air purifiers in every treatment room to help purify the air from virus, bacteria, and allergens.

• Although you will see our admin team on site they will be available by phone only to minimize exposure for client/team. Your therapist will collect any copays.

Please understand that these are confusing times for everyone and we are doing the best we can to help keep everyone safe. Your All Things Possible Wellness Center team is eager to continue to support you and are looking forward to seeing you either in person, or online. Together, we will get through this!

By: Linnea Sieh, MA, LPC

Although we are all inside, potentially anxiously awaiting a return to normal life, one of the coolest things that’s come from all of this has been the abundance of resources that are being offered to help alleviate stress and boredom. Keeping your mind occupied during stressful times is one of the best things you can do to help your mental health. Resting counts as one of the important things, by the way, and is important to keep you mentally healthy.

If you’re looking for something interesting to do, or your kids are bouncing off the walls, here are some fun things to check out that might give you some extra joy in your day.

For you history buffs out there, there are some museums offering virtual tours. The Smithsonian Natural History Museum has virtually opened its doors for visitors.

https://naturalhistory.si.edu/visit/virtual-tour

The Museum of Modern Art also has a tour, if art is more your thing.

https://www.moma.org/

You can also find coloring pages of artwork from some major museums.

http://library.nyam.org/colorourcollections/

If you missed a family trip hiking or camping this year, take a look at this virtual tour of Yellowstone National Park.  https://www.nps.gov/yell/learn/photosmultimedia/virtualtours.htm

Or, if you’re dreaming of a garden that you don’t have to weed, check out these garden tours from House Beautiful magazine.

https://www.housebeautiful.com/lifestyle/gardening/g31746949/gardens-you-can-virtually-tour/

Now would be the perfect time to plan a garden too, if you have the space and time. Gardening, as well as being outside, has been shown to be effective in boosting mood. There is also a sense of pride and accomplishment when your garden starts coming to life.

If animals make your heart sing, you’re in luck! There are several zoos and aquariums that offer live webcams in different animal exhibits. The Detroit Zoo offers an Otter Cam and a Penguin Cam!

https://detroitzoo.org/otter-live-cam/

https://detroitzoo.org/penguins-live-cam/

The Georgia Aquarium (the largest Aquarium in the country) has some live feeds as well. Watching sea life can be very relaxing and calming.

https://www.georgiaaquarium.org/webcam/beluga-whale-webcam/

The National Aquarium has several live cams as well.

https://www.aqua.org/Experience/live#btr

If your kids need a few extra things to do, here’s some more fun ideas for them.

#OperationStoryTime: authors reading their stories to kids. You can search the hashtag on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter.

My favorite is Storytime From Space, which is when astronauts from the International Space Station read kids’ books from outer space! How cool is that? You can find more information here:

https://storytimefromspace.com/

Another awesome space themed idea is this cool collaboration that lets you explore Mars. Talk about a getaway! https://accessmars.withgoogle.com/#

Also available are some exercise and movement resources, for when you just need to move! This website, Dancing Alone Together, helps you search for virtual dance classes.

https://www.dancingalonetogether.org/

You can find a lot of videos on YouTube for free. One really good yoga program is called “Yoga With Adrienne.” For kids, “Cosmic Kids Yoga” is full of imaginative yoga stories for younger kids.

If you are missing the thrill of roller coasters, you can also virtually ride some of the Disneyland rides! Set up a couch coaster station and you’ll be ready to ride!

https://www.wfla.com/community/health/coronavirus/kids-stuck-at-home-should-go-on-these-virtual-disney-world-rides/

Of course, walking outside is still free and open. You could try a nature scavenger hunt, play I Spy, or take a pet for an extra long walk. Reach out via text, phone, or video chat to friends and family. Be creative with ideas on how to reach out. Have a virtual picnic in your backyard, or a distance movie watching party.

If you find yourself needing a little extra help managing mental health concerns at this time, reach out to your mental health care provider or the local crisis line. In Macomb County that number is 586-307-9100.

Give yourself and others the benefit of compassion in this challenging time. We at ATPWC are here, offering telehealth sessions, encouragement, and healing during this worldwide crisis. You are not alone! Please call us today at 586-213-5505 or email adminteam@allthingspossiblewc.com

By: Ashley Kraut, MA, LPC, NCC

The world if fast paced and full of distraction. How easily can we be consumed by flashy advertisements, electronic notifications, videos, etc? There is a choice in each fleeting moment, we get to decide if we experience the moment, or something else. Whether it be scrolling on our phones or just getting lost in thought, we are either in the present moment, or we are not. Take a moment to think about what you could be missing out on when you choose to disconnect. Maybe it is the beauty of your surroundings, maybe a random act of kindness, maybe it’s your child’s sweet face. What are you missing? Do you want to continue to do so? When we make the choice to disconnect it not only takes us away from reality, but it can also fill our minds with thoughts that may not be helpful. For example, how often do you compare yourself to others and start a process of self criticism when you are scrolling through social media? How do you feel when your every thought is consumed with the many tasks you have to accomplish during the day, or fears for the future? I know that not all social media is harmful and daydreams are not always sad or fearful, but I challenge you to start paying attention to what is influencing you and what is being missed out on. Be intentional and take more moments to observe your surroundings, to notice and actually live your life. “Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, you could miss it” (Ferris Bueller’s Day Off).

By: Ashley Kraut, MA, LPC, NCC

Experiencing emotions is a natural human experience, but sometimes these emotions can be extreme and difficult to tolerate in the moment. When emotions are extreme and impairing functioning, or acting on the extreme emotions would be harmful, then some skills can be utilized to reduce the intensity of the emotions and prevent acting on harmful urges. The skills listed below are specifically for surviving an emotional crisis. 

• Make a pros and cons list. Be sure to include the pros and cons of acting on crisis urges, and the pros and cons of not acting on the urges.

• Utilize the TIP skills that change the chemistry in your physical body. T-Tip the Temperature of your body by holding cold water on your face for 30 seconds. I-Intense exercise to expend energy. P-Paced breathing by breathing deep into your belly. Make sure you inhale slowly, and exhale even slower. Make sure your belly and ribs expand with each breath. 

• Utilize paired muscle relaxation involving tensing and releasing each muscle group. To start, find a quiet place and begin paced breathing. You can sit or lie down in a comfortable position without any limbs crossed. For each muscle group, tense the muscles for 5-6 seconds while inhaling, then release the muscles as you exhale. Observe the sensations in your body as you tense and release. Try starting with these areas: the hands and wrists, lower and upper arms, shoulders, forehead, eyes, nose and upper cheeks, lips and lower face, tongue and mouth, neck, chest, back, stomach, buttocks, upper legs and thighs, calves, and ankles. Paired muscle relaxation is a practice, so the more it is utilized the easier it will become to relax the body in different environments, and to relax all muscles at once.

• Effective rethinking can be used by paying attention to what you are telling yourself in the moment and challenge the self-talk. For example, instead of telling yourself “I can’t handle this,” you can say instead “I am uncomfortable but I can handle this emotion/experience.”

• Body scan meditation involves muscle groups again, but without tensing. While utilizing paced breathing, focus on one part of your body. Imagine you are breathing through that area of your body and notice the sensations in that part of your body. You can focus on each part for several minutes. You can include every body part including your toes and the top of your head. 

• Pay attention to you five senses to self-soothe. What are the small details you can see, hear, feel, smell or even taste? Can you create a sensory experience for yourself by eating your favorite snack, lighting your favorite candle, taking a bath, or gazing at the clouds? Be creative with this surviving skill.

• Distract yourself by doing something that will take your mind off of the situation such as coloring, reading, writing, watching funny videos, calling a friend, doing something nice for someone else, organizing, or creating. 

These skills are to be utilized for short term distress. If you are having urges to harm yourself or others during the crisis and the urges do not subside after attempting these skills, please call 911 or go to your local emergency room. For more information please refer to Marsha Linehan’s DBT Skills training or make an appointment at our office for guidance (586-213-5505). There is no need to go through a crisis alone.

Linehan, M. (2015). DBT skills handouts and worksheets, second edition. New York, NY: The Guilford Press.

 

By Linnea Sieh MA, LLPC, NCC

Resolutions. Does this word scare you? Do you make and keep resolutions? Or do they just cause stress and annoyance? Many people make resolutions to be healthier, spend more time
with family, do more things that give us joy, or learn a new skill. Do any of us make resolutions to make room for self-care and relaxation?

It’s not always easy to remember to take time for the things that relax us. We have a tendency to want to keep moving, to not stop, and push towards completing everything. But if you’re
pushing forward so fast, you forget about the present, how can you gain everything you need from those moments?

Whether or not you make resolutions this year, gratitude for the good things, taking time to stop and remember things you love, and things that bring you joy, can actually help you keep those resolutions.

Gratitude is something that can be easily lost in the hustle and bustle of the holidays. One way to help remind yourself of things to be grateful for, or things to be proud of, is the make
a Gratitude or Memory jar. This can be a jar, a bowl, a shoebox, anything really. In this container, you will put memories, ticket stubs, favorite sayings, funny moments, and
things you are proud of. Keep a pad of paper next to it and a pen, so you can jot things down as you remember them. Make sure it is out in a visible place, so that you remember to write them
down. Maybe try to have a time during the week where you add to it. Over the next year, if you’re having a rough day, reach in and pull out a memory and spend some time remembering
the feeling that it gave you.

Keep adding to it all year and then on New Year’s Eve or New Year’s Day, dump them all out
and go over your year. What did you do that brought you joy? Did you take any fun trips or try a
new experience?

Remembering memories and special events can bring you the same kinds of feelings you had
when you were having the experience the first time. It might even keep you motivated to keep moving forward towards your goals!

By: Linnea Sieh, MA, LPC

Summer: a time for beach trips, family vacations, ice cream (my favorite part,) and spending time with friends and family. Living in Michigan makes it even more special, since we seem to only get summer weather for maybe a few days at a time. What people don’t realize about summer is how much of a toll it can take on our self-esteem. Even though everything seems better when it’s sunny, it does have its own pitfalls.

Think about it, there you are, minding your own business and you see something that makes you stop and doubt yourself. Maybe it’s someone wearing something you wish you were confident enough to wear, eating an ice cream cone when you’re concerned about your weight, or even going on a trip you think you might never be able to afford. Any of those things can make us feel down about our lives.

The important part is how we respond to those situations. Do you hide inside, not have the experiences you want to have, or get stuck in a negative cycle? These might be the easier ways to go about our lives, but definitely not the most productive.

Instead of focusing on the situations you can’t change, try focusing on the things you can change. Maybe you feel you don’t look good in that particular swimsuit, but you feel awesome in one with a different style or pattern. Maybe you’re nervous about going to an outdoor concert by yourself, but if you asked a friend to come along, it could help. As for a glamorous looking trip, you might be seeing only the good side. You might not see strange foods, bug bites, or hard hotel beds. There are lots of things to do in the summer that are free or low cost. Try looking into local events that could be just as fun, while you get to sleep in your own house!

My hope for you this summer is that you won’t let yourself get in the way of making and keeping those summer plans. Try something new, or something that scares you, just a little.

By: Karen Weier MA, LLPC, NCC

When we first meet someone, who we think will be our forever person, we are intentional on developing a friendship with them. We want to get to know everything about them. Why does this intentionality, this desire to be friends, seem to fade after marriage or a commitment is made? Many couples, who walk through my office door, have stopped strengthening their friendship. According to Dr. John Gottman (1999), in his study and observation of habits that make and/or break a marriage, he has found that at the heart of a happy marriage is a deep friendship. Bolstering the friendship is so critical, Gottman explains, because it fuels romance, passion, and intimacy. Gottman (1999), in his book the Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work, explains seven basic principles that can help guide couples on the path to a long lasting and harmonious relationship. The first three principles allow couples to rediscover the friendship that brought them together, in the first place.
The first step, in helping couples rebuild their friendship, is to help them learn how to build love maps (Gottman, 1999). Love maps are a road map of your partner’s internal psychological world. It’s asking open ended questions, remembering the answers, and really paying attention to the details of your partner’s world. It involves remembering the major events in each other’s history and constantly updating this information as the facts and feelings of your partner’s world changes. This is also the time to periodically take your partner’s emotional temperature, asking “how are you doing, baby?” and really wanting to know, how they are doing.
The second step, in helping couples rebuild their friendship, is to help them build fondness and admiration, two crucial elements in a rewarding and long-lasting romance. This involves focusing on the positive habit of mind by looking for what your partner is doing right. It’s a time to express fondness, affection, and admiration, verbally and physically, which is done in small amounts, but often. When couples are able to express fondness and admiration it builds a culture of appreciation, respect, fondness, and intimacy (Gottman, 1999).
The third step, in helping couples rebuild their friendship, is to help them learn how to turn toward bids for connection, which builds trust and romance. Romance is kept alive each time you let your partner know that they are valued during the grind of everyday life. Partner’s make bids for connection, for attention, interest, excitement, humor, conversation, affection, support, or playfulness. You can either turn towards or turn away from your partners bid. When you choose to turn towards your partners bid you are building trust and an emotional connection (Gottman, 1999).
A deep friendship is at the heart of a happy marriage/relationship. Happy couples have mutual respect, for each other, they enjoy each other’s company, they are well versed in the likes and dislikes of each other, they share in each other’s hopes and dreams, and they express fondness and admiration, for each other, in big ways but through small gestures, day in and day out. Do you need help rediscovering or reinvigorating friendship with your partner? Our qualified therapists, at All Things Possible Wellness Center, desire to help you and your partner rediscover and strengthen your friendship, as you continue to build your life together.

Gottman, J. M. & Silver, N. (1999), The seven principles for making marriage work, New York: Harmony Books.

By: Tonya Rice MA, LPC

One evening, I entered one of the local bookstores in my neighborhood.  When browsing the shelves, I reached for a book titled “Nowhere but Up”, a memoir written by Pattie Mallette.  I began to read the first couple of pages of her book and she described a dream that she had. She wrote,

“One night I had a dream in which my job was to clean out every room in a gigantic house, which was made up mostly of bedrooms.  The bedrooms belonged to girls of different ages, from babies to teenagers, and were stuffed with clothes, garbage, and toys piled almost a foot high.  I was so overwhelmed by the task.  In the first room, I couldn’t do much more than clear a bit of space around my feet by shoving some of the stuff to the side.  So, I decided to go to another room and to try again.  It was more of the same.  I repeated this process in room after room, with the same result- all I could manage to do was clear a small space around my feet.  I was frustrated.  I didn’t have a clue how to start cleaning up.

As I stood there, unable to move, I heard a voice.  Instinctively, I knew it belonged to God.  “Go to the beginning of the house,” He said.

My dream self knew what I had to do.  I went to the first room of the house, the living room, and started removing every single object from the room.  I dumped everything outside- couches, lamps, rugs, tables, pictures, books- until the room was empty.  Then I scrubbed the walls clean, repainted them, and brought back in only the items I wanted.  One room was clean.  Now I knew how to go back and clean the rest.

When I woke from the dream and meditated on it, I saw a correlation between the house in that dream and the events of my childhood.  The different rooms represented me at different ages and the areas of my life I was trying to clean up or heal as an adult.  The simple instruction from the dream struck me.  Go to the beginning.”

This dream explains the process of counseling in such a clear analogy.  We need to “go the beginning”.  Counseling is also a lot like gardening.  When you weed a garden, you first start with digging to the root of the weed to prevent it from growing back.  At the beginning of my counseling career, I found myself frustrated.  I spent time working with people addressing surface issues without seeing much change.   Or the issues seemed to be addressed, but would quickly return.  That was when I recognized that unless you get to the root of an issue, it will be as ineffective as cutting leaves from weeds or chopping the visible portion of the weed off, only for it to continue to grow and take over the garden.  Getting to the beginning or the root of an issue is key to the cure of it.  Once you get to the root, you can uproot the weed and move on to the next one.  Once your garden is free of weeds, you can focus on replanting beautiful plants and flowers in their place.

To begin we need to identify what weeds are in your life.  Simply put, weeds are the surface issues in your life that lead you to seeking help. It could be a failing relationship, a lingering sadness that will not go away, worry, stress, conflicts with friends, feeling alone, anger, unsatisfied in life, pressure to perform, addiction, affairs, lying, shame, guilt, trouble sleeping, irritable mood, disappointment, discouragement, hopelessness, worthlessness, difficulty concentrating, overwhelmed with life, desire to divorce, not wanting to live, etc.  These are the initial reasons that lead people to coming into my office for counseling.  Many aspects of counseling focus on providing you with coping skills, conflict resolution skills, and positive self-talk.  These skills are techniques are very important and are helpful, however, they do not eliminate the problem and do not deal with the root/core of an issue.

In order to fully understand and recognize how to truly root out negative problems in your life we first must understand our minds.  Our minds are the foundation of where the journey begins.  Through counseling at All Things Possible Wellness Center, we strive to help you get to the root of your issues and lead a life that is enjoyable, fulfilling and peaceful.  It is my hope that you would consider counseling as a method that can help you to process through deep rooted problems in a comfortable, non-judgmental and safe environment.

By: Linnea Sieh MA, LLPC

The recent popularity of the Netflix show “13 Reasons Why” has brought the topics of suicide, sexual assault, and bullying to the forefront of the public eye. To many professionals, this show is concerning, due to the high levels of trauma shown and the refusal to discuss any mental health symptoms or treatments that could have helped the main character. Because it was marketed primarily for teens, some teens are watching this show and feeling overwhelming emotions with no one to safely discuss them with.

Suicide, especially, is a topic that can be frightening or uncomfortable to talk about with your loved ones. One misconception around suicide is that by talking about it, you will put the idea of committing suicide into someone’s mind. This isn’t true, in fact if you are considering asking about it, the idea is oftentimes already in that person’s mind. As a professional counselor, my job involves frequently asking these hard questions to adults and teens. While it is never an easy task, it is important to be up front about suicide, sexual assault, and bullying. All of these topics can be triggers for people already struggling with their mental health symptoms. Knowing where to turn for resources, both local and national, is an important step in understanding how to help people who are experiencing these thoughts. The following is a list of 13 local and national resources and ideas for anyone who may need mental health help:

1.    Help get the person to see a mental health professional. All Things Possible Wellness Center is one of the best options for mental health treatment in Macomb County. We can be reached at 586-213-5505, or on the web at https://allthingspossiblewc.com/. We are located in Clinton Township and accept most private and also Medicaid HMO insurances.

2.    Macomb County Community Mental Health: This agency offers mental health care for those with state insurance and those who have a low income. Substance use services are also offered here. They have psychiatrists, case managers, and therapists on staff. They can be reached at 586-948-0222, or on the web at http://www.mccmh.net/.

3.    Urgent Behavioral Health Care Center accepts anyone as a walk-in for mental health emergencies. They are located at 43800 Garfield Rd in Clinton Township, MI, and provide services 365 days a year and are open 24/7. They can be reached by phone as well at 586-466-6222.

4.    Harbor Oaks Hospital is a psychiatric facility for inpatient, partial hospitalization, and intensive outpatient care that is available in emergencies as well. They provide services for mental health care and substance abuse. They are located at 35031 23 Mile Rd New Baltimore, MI 48047. They can be reached by phone at 855-738-8198.

5.    In Oakland County, MI, people can call Common Ground at 800-231-1127 for access to 24/7 crisis counseling and for an access screening to receive information regarding mental health providers.

6.    Mental Health First Aid training. Many of the core, or state funded, organizations offer some type of Mental Health First Aid training for non-professionals looking to understand more about how to help someone in a crisis setting. Training and Treatment Innovations, Inc, in Oxford and Troy is one of the agencies who has a grant to teach these skills. They can be reached at the Troy office at 248-524-8801 for more information on current and future trainings.

7.    National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: This crisis line can be reached online at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/. They can also be reached by phone at 1-800-273-8255. The Lifeline is a network of local crisis centers and resources that can be accessed 24/7. There is also a live chat option on the website. In addition to this lifeline someone in crisis can text 741741 24/7 for help as well. This text is not answered by the NSPF but has also been found useful.

8.    This article from Amy Morin, LCSW, details some reasons why the show could be triggering for people experiencing suicidal thoughts or other mental health concerns. https://www.inc.com/amy-morin/13-things-parents-should-know-about-13-reasons-why-according-to-a-psychotherapis.html?cid=search

9.    The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention is another organization that has multiple resources for those involved in any way with suicide. The website also includes resources for how to talk to someone about their mental health called “Look Both Ways.”  https://afsp.org/

10.  SAVE: Suicide Awareness Voices of Education has a set of tips and talking points for anyone watching “13 Reasons.” https://www.save.org/blog/tips-watching-new-netflix-series-13-reasons/

11.  Reporting On Suicide offers guidelines for those responsible for reporting or speaking about suicide. It includes recommendations for bloggers, journalists, and news media professionals. It also lists warning signs and what to do if you know someone exhibiting these signs. http://reportingonsuicide.org/recommendations/

12.  Another important piece of taking care of someone who is hurting is to first take care of yourself. Here is a list of self-care activities written by the Good Therapy staff members. It is a very thorough list. If you are having difficulties thinking of activities to do, lists like this can give you other options. http://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/134-activities-to-add-to-your-self-care-plan/

13.  Above all, know your limits and be prepared to keep your boundaries in place with regards to your own mental health. Have a list of safe people that you can talk to and get professional help if needed. Remember, even if it feels like it, you are not alone!

 

By:  Karen Weier, MA, LLPC, NCC

Most of us can probably agree that we have worried, about an actual or potential problem.   Our worries might be centered around our finances, health, relationships, finding the right partner, losing a job, parenting, peer pressure, driving, pet health, family problems, to name a few.  Sometimes we simply worry that we are worrying too much.  If you suffer from constant worry, you may already know that worry can create physical symptoms, cause relationships to suffer, one can become less productive, become irritable, argumentative, and lose interest in activities that were once enjoyable.

According to Kevin L. Gyoerkoe, PsyD and Pamela S. Wiegartz, PHD (2006) worry consists of three main parts:  future orientation, we worry about something that hasn’t happened yet; catastrophizing, we think about the future negatively, we focus on the worst possible outcome; and thirdly worry is language based thought versus image based.

Not all worry is bad.  Gyoerkoe and Wiegartz label worry as productive and unproductive.  Productive worry allows us to solve and react to realistic problems or situations in our lives. It pushes us to take immediate action to solve problems; taking care of an over-due bill or changing our eating habits in order to have optimal health.  Unproductive worry generates no clear course of action.  Instead of taking productive steps toward action these worries stop us in our tracks and creates more unproductive worry.  Unproductive worry also causes us to focus on an unlikely event; car crash, plane crash.  Unproductive worry stops us from living in the here and now, it causes us to miss out on opportunities, fun, advancements, adventure.

The next time you find yourself worrying ask yourself:

• Am I focusing on a realistic problem?
• Is the problem solvable?
• Is the worry motivating me to take action?
• Can I come up with potential solutions?
• Am I or can I act on these solutions?

If you answered no, to any of these questions, your worry is more than likely unproductive.

Gaining control of worry is not a simple task.  It takes hard work, motivation, but most importantly it takes commitment.  You need to commit to change and commit to sticking to the commitment.  Commitment is vital if you want to gain control and manage worry.  Once you have committed to change several other tools and techniques need to be learned and practiced.  These include; learning to relax, changing ones thinking, learning to react differently, learning to accept uncertainty, learning how to manage time, learning to communicate assertively, and learning to confront ones worries (Gyoerkoe & Wiegartz, 2006).

Worry affects how we think, behave, feel, and relate to others.  My hope for you is that by reading this you will be prompted to begin your journey towards managing unproductive worry.   If you would like to learn more about managing unproductive worry, our clinicians at All Things Possible Wellness Center would be honored to walk along side of you, and provide you with the tools and techniques you need to manage and take control of your worry.  Our desire is to help you have a life that is productive and filled with joy, happiness, and peace.

References

Gyoerkoe, K & Wiegartz, P. (2006) 10 simple solutions to worry.  Oakland, CA:  New Harbinger

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